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I swear
I was
there 5 months of planning and 12 months of waiting and we were finally on our way, the legion was on the move to Skegness ........The AFSC Legion After riding off the local trade ship where smugglers pirates and pilgrims were exchanging wares and lost maps I rode what I now know as my trusty stead to Bagzy and Pauline's HQ to meet up with Pete and his wife and 2 lads. We had only traveled about 4 miles before Petes Chetak Bajaj curry special decided it would give a little warning by backfiring and nearly stopping but no dramas and we safely made our way into Aldershot, home of the British Army to rv with Treacle and gang where we would load the truck. Once loaded with kit and a couple of scoots we set of for Oxford where we would pick up the rest of the Southern Division. The short Journey to Oxford was non eventful (rare for the SD) and enjoyable with a beer and the usual piss taking and friendly banter that we all know. Once we had loaded up we set off for Skeggy in our now over laden truck with 8 scooters, tents, bbq's and 9 bods in the back all not knowing what was in store for us. 2 hours into the journey and we are all starting to wilt as the heat and fumes becomes a little to much but this never stopped the excitement we had to do this rally. It was that hot that we all looked like refugee/asylum seekers all on our way to work or being smuggled through the ports of Europe. We had all agreed if we were stopped that when questioned by the authorities we would all answer to the name of "Gary". As usual the Southern Division we like to take our time over things so by now we were running a bit late for the FRV with the main body but not a problem as Anne Summers decided it would be a good idea to park up in a police station with a vehicle full of scooters and immigrants all called "Gary", not a good idea so we moved on to a local industrial estate to unload and ride the final 60 miles or so in to Skeggy. We all set off and Daz's dog decided it was going to lay down smoke to cover us across the roundabout, in the truck Daz went with his Spar bag full of tools as we carried on. After getting lost about 20 times and Gaz going his own route we finally arrived at the campsite to be greeted by the rest of the club. There were over 80 members present and what can only be said as very drunk allready but it was great to meet old friends and new ones. The beer and banter fload well that Friday night some went and stayed in the pubs when others decided they would gig it up but the amount of members who were at the ship inn was amazing.
Saturday morning had come and we had realized we all had been burgled, thats burgled with a "L", someone had stolen all the money out of our pockets, all our kit had been thrown around in our tents and someone or something had................well you know, I didn't know we had kleptomaniac Bears on the east coast of England? Myself Treacle, Smudge and Gaz decided we would venture into town to get a nice breakfast but we decided against it and went to McDonalds instead. Whilst munching my delicious arse burger 2T coffee I had a text of Daz to get some quick drying Araldite to fix his plasticene crank.......Quick drying eh? No bother myself and smudge got some from a local quick drying glue shop. Some funny things were said that day but two stick in my mind were Mik running from his tent shouting "I'm not licking that again it tastes like fish" and Mick Holt with his obsession of the ram jam band as he repeated it over and over again, you had to be there to appreciate it.
Saturday afternoon came and went with a ride out to a local tavern in one hell of a head wind with a superb BBQ back at the campsite cooked by our two naked chefs Dave "sausage swinging" Bellis and Spencer "Chicken boner"Wakelam who done a superb job keeping the sausages from burning on the inside, I must say the bread rolls and coleslaw was excelent. The night was upon us again and we had our own little recess put by for us by the pub landlord so the rest of the pub could enjoy a quiet drink. Thanks to the nights previous cocktails and filth by Dicky "coats" smudge was insisting myself and him carried the nights trend on drinking Moon milk, for those who don't know what it is don't ask as I've forgot "I swear I was there" but its some kind of green minty stuff in a bottle, but to beat it all was to dink some WKD rubbish and cinamon gold, not good as it went solid in the bottle but it was downed in the end ...........yukkkkkkkkkkk!!!! The nights tricks was not over yet as a lull in the battle had set in so myself and smudge decided to invent the game of drinking from a bottle upside down suspended by a picnic table, the chosen drink was Moon milk. Big Gaz was the first to try it and had little difficulty completing the task then Emma had a go and after some what of trying to chat and swear at Mik for perving she finaly cracked it. Onwards and upwards we went off to another pub where the night would draw to a close with a superb rendition of "Honey " by Treacle. Mik had to prompt the DJ that our Treacle was disabled and suffered from a rare complaint of touretes when he spoke. This song and the site of this skinhead with jungle hat on will live with me for ever the tears just rolled down my face and I had to fall out the pub .............superb!
Sunday was here all to quick and it was PUFO time (pack up and f*** off) but what will live for me for ever is that a club that has 160 members spread all over Europe and all corners of the Uk can still get over 80 of them in one place where ever it may be is fantastic, this rally was that good and for those who couldn't attend its worth lying about it and saying "I swear I was there". Thanks to everyone who made this weekend special. Simon and Dai for doing what they do and Mik and Sue for recce duty's and logistics and the Southern Divisions show of force, 32 members not bad for a Div who's only been going for 8 months................The Armed Forces Scooter Club.......nuff said And honey, I miss you and I'm being good
s**t c** Sing along with treacle by clicking here
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